Frontpage Story #39

Hi there, Comcrap sufferers. I'm one of you.

One upon a time (around 1995) a crappy company called Comcrap (also know as Compaq) lauched this beautiful pair of machines. They were called Presario 5220 and Presario 5226. They had a 100MHz Intel Pentium processor, which was just like "wow, man!" at the time. And they had more! They had full MPEG support, 8Mb of RAM memory (not much, but what the heck), came with
windows 95 (wow! cool! <--yeah right.. well, it looked cool at that time, anyway) and TONS of software CDs. But wait! There IS more! They have TV BOARDS! Woooow!! Really great. The
only difference between them: 5220 had a 800Mb HD and 5226 had 1 Gb. Okay, the price difference wasn't too big, and I was so astounded, they looked so beautiful... I chose the 5226. And I payed an incredible amount of about three thousand dollars to take this baby home. At that time, a regular fairly good computer would cost about 2000 here in Brazil. So I've arrived home, plugged all the stuff in, and turned it on.

(about ONE HOUR AND A HALF later...)

Wow, it finished installing the software. I was wondering why they didn't pre-install the software so the users wouldn't have to wait. But okay, let's check this babe out. And thanks God, everything was working right. I blessed my mom with all my heart for giving me this expensive machine, I felt like the happiest boy in the world. (a couple of months later...) New models were being developed by Comcrap, but mine was still very good. I had this little impression that it wasn't so fast anymore, but it probably was just on my mind. (yeah.)

(about 3 months later...)
As I was new on this windows 95 stuff (just like everyone else, 'cos win95 itself was new), I made some mistake and the CD-ROM unit wouldn't play my music CDs automatically anymore. I remembered the reseller gave me a phone number, "Comcrap tech support phone". I noticed it was a long-distance call (a call to another state) but ok, let's try it out. 20 minutes of wait later I was getting so pissed I had to hang-up. The annoying "hold-on" music on the phone was still playing on my head on the next day, when I tried again. After about 6 calls, someone finally talked to me. A woman with a nice voice (and a small brain) said I had to use the quick-restore CD. After 2 hours of back-ups, I finally ran the program. Quick restore? QUICK restore? It should be called "KeepItRunningAndGoToBed restore". A month later I figured out what I had done wrong with the Cd-rom and it was so easy to fix, I started to have my doubts about the Comcrap support.

(4 years and a million "SoCalledQuick" Restores later...)

You won't believe me, but I still have this piece of junk. The last time I called the Comcrap support obviously was not to ask for help, 'cos I don't trust that lamers anymore, and by the way, I just don't need them. I'm a programmer now, I know everything about windows and how to fix its problems. When I called, I had boosted this RAM memory to 40Mb and I said I wanted to get rid of this computer, so I asked how much I could ask for it. They laughed at me. I had my revenge right at the next moment. I thought "oh so you wanna play, let's play." I asked the man about the unknown
device that windows always detected at the hex 00E6-00E7 address. He couldn't answer. I asked about the Add-in devices section of the BIOS setup. He couldn't answer (I used that section to make a workaround so I could install another modem). I asked something more (don't remember now) and he suggested a quick restore. I laughed myself to death on that lamer.

The latest upgrade I did on this computer (and surely the LAST) was switching to a pentium 166 processor. Why not a faster one? Because Comcraq doesn't want me to. I figured out that the maximum processor speed I can use is 200MHz. No Pentium II, no MMX, nothing. And this pentium 200 is missing on the market. In fact it was very hard for me to find this 166. I cannot upgrade it anymore because Comcrap doensn't want me to. I cannot sell it anymore because nobody would want it, and anyway I'd have to sell it so cheap, it wouldn't worth. I'm suffering on this 1 Gb HD to free some space all the time. My local Comcrap hardware technician said I just can't switch to a larger HD unit because the quick restore CD would not work anymore. I can't even install a second (larger) HD because there is no room. To hell with you, Comcrap. I'm sick and tired of this. I'm buying another computer, and definately not from you, because YOU SUCK.

You guys reading may be asking why I didn't buy another computer yet. For 2 reasons: 1st, I am not rich at all. I'm working hard to make money but there are other things in life, like a new car ;-) and 2nd, my mom worked really hard to pay that 3000 bucks for this and I think this is one of the most admirable and valuable things she made for me. It has started my professional life. I'm selling cos I'll always respect and be thankful for what she made for me. Comcrap has insulted me. Comcrap has lied to me. Comcrap doesn't respect anyone. Comcrap doesn't really care. Comcrap lamer support sucks to hell. Comcrap is a total lame.

I still have lots to tell, really. But this is getting too long. This sentence says it all:
DON'T BUY FROM COMPAQ!

Thanks for reading.
Hugs